Untitled Document

10.24.2005

greezus chrust

so, the few of you that actually read the new print issue or know me personally, know that i've taken the leap from good old muskegon to lansing- that's right, capital city! just another fucking college town in my opinion, but it is our state capital as well. my broke ass doesn't get out much these days... not quite hermit status- i'm in the skee for shows and band practices and the like. but alas, welcome to capital city baby!

as for shows, the trustiest place so far has been mac's bar. i've seen gravytrain there, and most recently, 400 blows. mac's is right on michigan. there's another bar type club, the temple. i haven't been there yet, so your guess is as good as mine. if i recall, it is in an old church. they've got all kinds of weird events. i've heard from us beat that joe from forever youth is putting on house shows in lansing, but i haven't heard or seen anything about it, nor do i know how to get a hold of him. can anyone help me out? puke, art, & bee came for a weekend and met some punks and went to thier house. i feel so on the outside. it's weird from knowing everything to nothing. macs bar gets a lot of touring bands. so far they seem to have a lot of good shows.

as for life issues, i'm unemployed among other things that i can't get into- or would prefer not to on here.

browneyepie #6 is almost sold out... maybe 20 copies left of one of the best issues ever. bronwen and i have been doing a lot of screen printing lately. there's shirts and patches with the new browneyepie cassette logo, fuck you! i'm from muskegon with the .38 pointinatchya, and the twat force five collegiate logo. up in the works is a shirt that says fuck shit up in big bubble letters with a spray can monster that i drew, possibly some badcocks merch, and more! look for them in the shitshop soon!

jessi sadistic

The other day I was reading part of an issue of Cometbus titled Punk Rock Love that Matt had posted in his journal. I've read it before and thought it was amazing, and actually have it now. I thought although it's already done that I would do my own listing of what punk rock love is to me, what it has been to me, and god willing... what it will continue being to me. Here goes, I'm sure it's not asinteresting or as insiteful as Aaron's version, but I'm sure it will be theraputic for me. I couldn't write about just one man, or one incident, but you two... I did love you, and I always will.

ahm.

Punk rock love is watching him sleep with an empty beer can from last night still clutched in his hand, snoring, and still thinking he's the most beautiful thing that you've ever seen.
Sleeping under a nacho cheese stained bedspread at the worst dive in GR.
It's watching the sun rise from the backseat of my jeep because we don't have anywere else to go, sharing a cup of coffee that was pot burned from sitting for god knows how many hours at the 7/11, and just being greatful for the warmth.
Begging him to shower before getting into bed because he smells bad.
Helping with said shower, watching his mohawk slowly wilt under the spray.
Playing with the back of his hawk after its turned into a dread.
Jumping into every pile of leaves in a block together at 3 am and kissing.
Falling in love with a friend. Having to handle the fact that he doesn't love you. Nor will he ever.
Crying every time you pass a Long John Silvers, because you know it's his favorite place to eat.
Knowing my parents hate him, and possiably me, and not caring.
Knowing all my friends hate him, and once again, not caring.
Not caring about anything besides him and music.
Music. Punk rock love is always about music. Shows. Dancing. Nothing to me means love more than dance. Sweating. Watching you. Getting punched in the mouth, but caring about nothing except the feeling. Sharing the taste of the blood in my mouth.
Connecting without even touching. That moment when everything becomes one thing and it's almost like watching a frame of a film. Then touching.
Punk rock love is about him having better hair, and being proud.
Splitting bottles of hair dye. Sewing together. Studding together. Painting, drawing, learning together.
Teaching each other "easier" ways to do hair, alter clothing, break the law.
Letting him have the last of the Freeze It.
Stealing glue from work to put up his hair.
Duct tape bondage. Masking tape bondage. Stud belt bondage. Bondage in any form.
It's about being young and not caring about tomarrow, as long as that person is there.
Shyly losing your virginity listening to the Pist, while 12 of your closest
friends cheer you on from the living room.
Squeaky bedsprings in your best friends house.
Sharing a Marlboro after, and trying to figure out what next.
Four years later still not knowing what comes next.
Punk rock love is finding out that he's had another girlfriend in a different town for two years, and wanting him still.
Spliting a pint of peppermint schnaups walking through a cemetary.
Punk rock love is biting his shoulder, fucking in the front seat of his car parked in your driveway, the scent of leather soo strong that it still makes you remember that night.
Your boyfriend sleeping in the house.
Losing your panties and wearing his boxers home.
Waking up on a sidewalk on the west side because people are stepping over you, with him sleeping beside you, not knowing where you are...
where your car is...
or what time it is.
Painting his toenails pink while he sleeps.
Playing Nintendo. Him thinking you rule because you still have the gray box.
Pornographic Scrabble.
Drunk, sloppy sex. Sober, attentive sex. Post show tired but still horny sex. Having sex on your friends couch while they're roomate snores 5 feet away. Sex on your stairs, because you cant make it into the house. In the cornfield behind my house. In empty barns, the Denny's bathroom, against the hallway wall. Before the show. After the show. During the show.
The look in a smokey bar. The look driving down the road. Pulling over because the look has got to you soo bad you can't tell the break pedal from the gas.
Feeling compleat just because he's in the room.
Shitty tattoos and infected piercings.
Him putting on his best and only sweater to go with you to your best friend's mother's funeral. Wiping away your tears with his sleave. Holding you when you needed him more than anything. Letting you hold him when he doesn't even know what he needs anymore.
You going to shows that he wants to go even though you hate the band.
Him going to your "shitty" shows even though he hates the band.
Hugging him and having it feel right. More right than anything else in your shitty life.
Concieving a child. Losing a child. Not telling him out of a mixture of love and fear.
Him puking and you rubbing his back. You puking and him rubbing your back.
Vomit laced kisses.
Clumsy gropes.
Snarling at girls for even looking at him. Even when you're not dating.
Working your ass off, and getting his band booked. Driving him to practices, shows, helping to cart his shit from point A to point B, even though you just worked 8 hours and would prefer sleep to anything else.
While in high school, stealing my parents car just to come see him.
Taking in pop bottles to scrape up enough change to pick him up for the weekend.
Dancing in the middle of Meijer at 6 am.
Birthday cake ate on the hood of a car.
Ditching your "rock star crush" so you can go home to him.
Hand wrote notes in pink crayon.
Driving and singing along to music, dorking it up and looking over to see him doing the same.
Him holding my hand while I'm getting tattooed.
Waking up because his teeth are chattering after you stole the blankets yet again.
Crying while listening to The Descendents "Hope" because it hits too close to home.
Tears. Tears over missed phone calls, birthdays, embraces.
Remembering just the good times.

Jessay Sadistic
imanupstart@hotmail.com

derek shit

well well well. not shit going. gwar is saturday so try and have fun if your not there. not shit happening. it seems the construction will be done after the weekend down on division. so let devils night roam free for the willing. offbeats are playing at skelletones on holloween. shitty venue but a good stage show in hand. you will survive. i plan on running around making mischief and getting free candy just like i did almost 10 years ago thats whats great about holloween is it dont matter as long as they cant look at your face and tell how old you are. and if they harrass me ill just say i dont have a house of my own to hand out candy from so ill just get it from your house. but fuck it. thats just the begining of the night. many beers will go down that night. so grand rapids has been quite lame for the last week, uhhh. yeah. sure. week. haha, its fun thought as long as your doing the harrassing cause if not your the one getting harrassed. but ohh well not much to report. i need to get a hold of ian. if anybody has any type of contact info for him please e-mail me at pxvsxc616@yahoo.com . ummmmmmmm not much else im kinda bored......end transmission.